When two people are in a relationship, it’s inevitable that they’ll fight at some point. This is especially true if and when they get married. But while conflict may be part and parcel of a marriage, too much fighting isn’t healthy. Most think of marriage as a once-in-a-lifetime blessing, but that’s not always the case, especially when husband and wife are always at each other’s throats.

The truth about what you’re experiencing
One mistake that many married couples make is that they go overboard trying to save their marriage. They don’t realize that it’s actually beyond repair and that to spend more time and effort on trying to fix things will only make things worse. The truth about married life is that some marriages are worth fixing or saving and some aren’t—and if you have a tumultuous relationship with your spouse, it would probably be better if you went your separate ways.

On the topic of abuse
If your spouse has been treating you badly for no good reason, you should definitely consider filing for divorce. Whether you realize it or not, staying in a rocky relationship could put you in danger of being abused. There are different types of abuse, such as emotional and physical abuse, and all of them are unacceptable, unhealthy modes of behavior. If your spouse is abusive, that means he or she isn’t someone you should be with. You shouldn’t hold out hope that they will change because chances are they won’t. An abusive person usually doesn’t see that the way they are treating their spouse is wrong. They may feel entirely justified about their behavior. If you confront them about it, they may become defensive and more abusive, which won’t be good for you or your kids (if you have any). While it may be hard for you to come to terms with the fact that your marriage has to end, getting a divorce as soon as possible is your best option. It will be harder for you to leave the longer you put it off, and you may end up with deeper emotional and physical scars if you insist on staying in an unsalvageable relationship.

In regard to “signs”
If your marriage is on the rocks, it’s a good idea to follow your gut. If your instincts are telling you that it’s high time you filed for divorce, go ahead and do it. Don’t wait for a sign to tell you what to do. That kind of thing only happens in books and movies. If there are serious issues that are driving a wedge between you and your spouse, and if you really feel like there’s nothing more you can do to fix things, you should cut your losses and move on. But make sure you’ve exhausted all your options before you do. If you and your spouse have had numerous confrontations and discussions that ultimately led nowhere, or if you’ve been feeling increasingly trapped in your marriage, then there’s no other course of action for you to take. Get out before your exhausting, loveless marriage consumes you whole. Don’t wait for a deus ex machina moment. If your reasons for wanting to leave are justifiable and your gut feeling is strong, then you should definitely save yourself further exhaustion and pain (whether physical or emotional) by filing for divorce.

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